The signs are subtle. Your parent or parents may not actually come out and say the words. But if you are paying attention, it’s not hard to see they are ripe for rightsizing. And seriously, though you are trying to be supportive and make sure their living situation meets their current needs and goals, it’s possible you may be part of the problem. Too often a single parent or couples are chomping at the bit to shed the family home but keep hanging on for fear the kids will be crushed at the thought.
Watch for these signs your parents are ready to downsize. Then, instead of enabling a less than optimal situation, be part of the solution. Let it be known you are enthusiastically on board with a move forward to experience the fun and freedom of an active adult community.
A Lot of Sighing
Are your parents constantly looking around at the overwhelming accumulation of stuff and just shaking their heads at the thought of dealing with it? They may be staying put just to avoid the nightmare of decluttering. Offer your services to help streamline the process and watch those sighs turn into smiles.
Declining Invitations
If you find your parents are reluctant to join you at restaurants or other activities that involve cost, it could be the house is becoming a money pit that is creating financial pressure. Sit down with them and discuss the benefits of selling the house and getting out from under the burden of home maintenance. At active adult communities, the numbers add up to fun and freedom.
Talk of Travel
If it seems all conversational roads lead to travel, clearly your parents are ready for the turnkey life. But their house may be impeding their ability to spontaneously pick up and go. Ask about their fantasy trip and suggest rightsizing into a new active adult lifestyle that would support their desire for adventure. Bye, bye house. Hello turnkey, stress free life and the ability to explore the world at a moment’s notice.
Did You Hear About So and So?
The old neighborhood has changed. New young families are living in the homes once occupied by your parents’ peers. How often do you hear how one or other old friend has moved away to some fabulous active adult community closer to their grandkids? Lamenting a dwindling social circle is a sure sign your parents are ready for a change, even if they don’t realize it yet.
The Stairs
Are your parents constantly complaining about the stairs? Even though their legs are up to the task, a two-story lifestyle at this stage can be hard on the knees. Discussing how many trips they made up and down the steps on any given day is a sure sign they are ready to live life on one floor.
Grandma Who?
If your parents live out of town, you and your kids may not see them often enough. This may be the perfect opportunity to help them relocate to an active adult community in your neck of the woods. Facetiming is great, but it doesn’t take the place of quality, in-person time together. When grandparents start making jokes about having to re-introduce themselves every time they call, they may indeed be ready to join a community closer to you.
Keep your eyes and ears open for the signs your parent or parents are ready to downsize. Your support and assurance that you will be part of the process will go a long way toward motivating them to pull the trigger on this major life change. Once they are happily ensconced in the active adult community of their choice, they will thank you—and wonder why they waited so long.